It’s been a while since I’ve been here. But I need to let it out

I’m so stupid!
How can I be so selfish. I messed up.
Thinking I was doing good when in reality I was faulty.
Now the one thing I love is hurt more than ever. What am I to do?
Improve. I have to better myself. Maybe that’s the problem?! I try to do good?
But the results are disastrous! She fell for me…because I’m me.
How arrogant am I to shy away from the one thing she loved about me…ME.
Everything’s my fault. Idk if I’m in pain. Or depression. But it’s making me crazy.
But despite it all..I want to fight for us. I want to keep us alive. We’re on the edge
and I wanna prevent us from falling.
I’ll do whatever it takes to make it right.
I’ll do everything I can & can’t do to make her happy again.
Until she’s happy, I won’t be.
Until I see her smile, I will be blind.
Until I hear her laugh, I’ll be death.
Until she’s complete. I’ll be incomplete.
Until it all, I’ll be dead.
Sounds stupid right? Really corny.
But isn’t love stupid? It makes us do all the stupid & crazy
thugs for ONE person because they deserve it.
I’m not gonna give up.
I love her too much for that.
I need her. She needs me.
And her love is all I ask for.
The things we do for love…